The Eurovision Song Contest has always been close to my heart – at least since 2012, when I first started watching. I’m a Eurovision baby compared to most of my friends, but every single year at Eurovision time, we bust out the drinks, turn up the TV, and play a drinking game. This year, in honour of Australia’s very own contestant, Guy Sebastian, Pop Culture-y is compiling our own set of drinking game rules. Viva la Australia!
The first semifinal airs tonight at 7.30pm on SBS1, and the second at 7.30pm Saturday. If you’re a diehard fan, can catch the Grand Final live at 5am on Sunday morning (we don’t recommend you play this drinking game if you’re watching it then). The plus side is, you’ll be able to vote. But if you’re not super fussed about voting, or about waking up several hours before sunrise, get some friends together and hold your very own Eurovision party – costumes not optional.
Giant props: Think big. Giant cage? Giant hamster wheel? Giant banana? Drink.
The key change: Classic. No explanation necessary. Skol if they go off key.
Aussie, Aussie, Aussie: Any reference to Guy Sebastian or Australia from the SBS hosts, particularly if Guy isn’t even on yet.
Technical difficulties: Lighting or sound delays – drink. If something actually goes horribly wrong during the performance, skol.
Not in English: As the ancient English proverb goes, we may be shit at Eurovision, but most of you are singing in English, so we win. If a contestant isn’t singing in English, drink. If the French performance is in English, skol.
Whistling: Apparently whistling is big this year.
Overwrought gestures: Think clenched fists, punching the air, or anything that adds to the emotional cheesiness of a performance.
Yawn: The ballad is incredibly boring? Drink. It may make it marginally more interesting.
Traditional costumes/instruments: The Romanian vampire doesn’t count. Think Russian grandmas.
Don’t quit your day job: A presenter tries and fails to be funny.
The reveal: My personal favourite is Turkey’s 2012 entry, in which…I don’t want to spoil it if you haven’t seen it. Just watch. Whenever a costume is whipped off, skol.
Lady (or man) in white: Drink. Bonus points if there are multiple people on stage and they’re all in white.
What?: This is a judgement call. If a song comes completely out of left field – not a ballad, not a cheery pop song, but like hard metal or opera or something, drink.
The fourth wall: A performer stares into/points straight at/etc the camera.
Politics: A performance is clearly trying to get a political point across.
Wind: Long flowing hair on both men and women is what Eurovision is all about. The moment they crank that wind machine, drink.
Fire: Any pyrotechnics.
Water: Water features. If you really want to stretch it, include those swirly light effects that kind of look like water.
Earth: A performer is barefoot.
Lee Lin Chin Wins: If Lee Lin Chin shows up, drink. It doesn’t matter what she says or does, just drink.